Heteronymphs

  There's a sewer in the sewer.
~~~~~
  The tower tower needed
a lot of room to maneuver.
~~~~~
  It's now in vogue to refuse the wretched refuse of others' teeming shores.
~~~~~
  For the funeral of the eminent fly tier,
His children felt impelled to light a fire,
And they wept upon his bier,             
Casting flies up tier on tier,           
In tribute to their piscatory sire.        
~~~~~
  A sow who decides to sow wild oats is likely to reap piglets.
~~~~~
  When the girl with legs like Marilyn Monroe's
Wore the sheerest kind of mini-denier hose,   
 No man was a denier                         
 Of the way she could inspire,               
Every male to take a more attentive pose.      
~~~~~
When the old Bedouin tired of Riyadh,
he would desert  it
for his ancestral home in the desert.
~~~~~~~
  Though the invalid looked pallid,
 Said her lover:
  "Not to worry."
Pessimism is invalid.
When I've sung my love a ballad,
 She'll recover
  In a hurry.
~~~~~~~
  The young dove dove from on high,
just to prove that it could fly.
~~~~~~~
  When the Yankees lost their lead,
their standing in the pennant race
sank like lead.
~~~~~~~
  Glow worms, who're by nature glowers,
 Glory in their powers,             
But if one's incandescence lowers,   
 Mercy! How he glowers!             
~~~~~~~
  His mother was a great novelist and his father
a famed poet, but despite his lineage,
the journalist son was reduced to being paid
by lineage.
~~~~~~~
Tie a bow around the bow of your canoe and
you'll be set,
For a great romantic paddle
with a heteronymphet.
~~~~~~~
  I've never met a liver wire than Dan,          
 A frisky ninety-seven year old man           
Who can jog or dance a jig without a quiver.   
 If you ask him how he stays so young and spry,
 He'll answer with a sly wink of the eye:     
"Good whiskey perks up any fellow's liver."    
~~~~~~~
  When infant bronchitis
spread through Las Vegas, the croupier took
bets that his baby was croupier
than anyone else's.
~~~~~~~
  "Oh, what I wouldn't give
for the sake of a cup of sake,"
the tired Tokyo businessman moaned.
~~~~~~~
  "Mein herr, I indeed sing a great Shubert lied!"
 The Berliner bellowed with pride.             
But when this smug fella performed a cappella,
 We knew he had blatantly lied.                
~~~~~~~
The bellboy did well
as an air conditioner-demonstrator,
but as a shower-shower he managed
to get himself thoroughly soaked.
~~~~~~~
  The tree surgeon studied yoga so that
he could become a more limber limber.
~~~~~~~
  The singer had plenty of ginger,      
But her voice was an eardrum_impinger,
 So torrid and smokey,               
 In high key or low key,              
That her song was a drapery singer.
~~~~~~~
  The nasty stepsisters ragged Cinderella
about her ragged clothes
until she was in tears about all the tears.
~~~~~~~
  It is rumored that Paderewski
liked to polish his Polish pate with paté.
~~~~~~~
  Teen-aged daughter, with aplomb,
Speaks the following to mom:
"Though you exercise with vigor
To retain your youthful figure,
This year's styles appear to be
Less appropriate for you than me,
Therefore, Mummy, I propose
To appropriate your clothes."
~~~~~~~
While the does doze, the buck does their laundry.
~~~~~~~
  The tuna was a tenor and the bass sang bass,
but they both could do   
their do, re, mi's swimmingly.
~~~~~~~
  My candle simply can't be lit.   
 I've tried until I'm licked.   
Some wicked mouse has nibbled it,
 Till it's no longer wicked.    
~~~~~~~
  The three men who were caught
urinating on the street were arrested,
and these peers were convicted by a jury
of their peers.
~~~~~~~
  The gentlemen's patent leather shoes
made it patent that he was a fop.
~~~~~~~
  The drawers are in their drawers,
but the model certainly  isn’t.
~~~~~~~
  Though the lumberman relaxes
while the loggers swing their axes
As destroyers of a forest of sequoias,
Spotted owls, torn from their axes,
quickly bundle into taxis